What A Good Man Brings to the Table

One of my biggest strengths must be optimism.

Like everyone else, my dating life was a rollercoaster (let’s be frank — it was a shitshow), but somehow I never really felt bitter about men and relationships.

When I turned my life around with the help of therapy, I wrote down a list of things I looked for in a partner. It was a long and detailed list including qualities that weren’t common in the men I’d met, but I had an unwavering belief that good men who were compatible with me were out there.

Just like that, shortly afterward, I met my soon-to-be-husband who is everything I could’ve asked for in a partner.

He has added so much value to my life, thus I want to write this post to celebrate him (it’s his birthday coming up soon) and remind you that having a good partner is an absolute blessing.

Here are 17 things (and counting) a good man can bring to the table:

1. Abundant love, care, and comfort

When we were dating, I never had to doubt my partner’s interest in me. Now, he’s always there, showing his love and care in every way possible.

In our daily life, he makes sure I’m comfortable and safe as he keeps an eye on everything around me. That’s why I’m worries-free around him.

2. An empathetic listener

I love talking to my partner about everything.

He makes me feel heard and understood, and he always has something intelligent and thoughtful to add to the conversation. He responds enthusiastically to everything I tell him, including silly nonsense throughout the day.

3. The loudest cheerleader!

I know for sure that my partner is proud of me and thinks I’m the smartest because he tells me that all the time. He talks (brags) about me to everyone in his life.

4. Fulfilling deep talks

Our conversations can easily go from fun chitchats to serious discussions — he stimulates me intellectually and makes me feel full emotionally.

5. Teamwork

Both of us are not a fan of housework so we do them together when we’re able to; every task is easier and faster when done by two.

Similarly, every burden is lighter when shouldered by two.

6. Financial and emotional security

Two incomes are better than one. And, without him, frankly, I’d have really struggled through the pandemic in many ways.

7. Physical pleasure!

He’s incredibly loving, giving, and affectionate; our intimacy runs through my body.

8. Hot dates

He’s well-dressed when we’re out together. I always feel very beautiful next to him as he compliments me all the time. Sometimes we forget that the world exists around us.

9. Daily appreciation

He says “thank you” and “love you” throughout the day for little things I do, or sometimes he surprises me with beautiful flowers I love.

10. New knowledge and experiences

I remember going on a hike together and he had answers to almost all questions I asked about random things we saw on the way — I was in awe!

He’s knowledgeable, well-traveled, and always ready to go on an adventure with me. I’ve learned a ton from his communication, patience, and kindness.

11. A much lighter backpack

When we’re out together, he always has his backpack ready with all the stuff I don’t even know I need. I never have to carry or lift anything I don’t want to. He’s also handy around the house.

12. Bodyguard

He stands between me and any sign of aggression, drunk men, the wind, mud, and many other things.

13. The best hugging pillow

Cuddling with him can ward off any stress. Being in his embrace melts me inside out.

14. Too much laughter

He makes me laugh till I cry so many times. I literally have laughed every day since we met — It’s visibly good for my health.

15. More energy to do things I love

Since he provides me with unlimited love, care, comfort, and helps remove unnecessary stress from my life, I’m left with so much energy and inspiration to do things I love.

In fact, that’s why I’ve been able to be quite active on Medium.

16. A lifelong companion

He’s my bestest friend.

17. A home, a family, and a future

When I felt sad about the fact that I was away from Vietnam for so long and didn’t have a home anywhere, he reminded me that we were building our home and family together — I was deeply touched.

Since the day he asked me to marry him, our future has become clear and I’ve got no doubt that it’ll be a fun, meaningful ride ahead. I’m ready for any challenges with him by my side.

Parting words

Trust me — I understand how hard and painful dating is.

Men and women everywhere complain about the dating pool and wonder where all the good ones have gone. They can list more reasons to be single than to couple up, and I don’t blame them.

But I want you to know that good relationships do exist and a good partner can add plenty of value to your life if you want one.

So, when you meet new people, protect yourself but have some faith — manifest the life you want through positivity and gratitude. Trust me, it’ll pay off.